Author Topic: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles  (Read 236326 times)

Offline Kiwi_Roy

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9796
  • Location: New Westminster BC
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #540 on: January 19, 2016, 09:39:14 AM »
In my strata lot I have 4 motorcycles
I was asked how I get the two at the back out.
72 Eldorado
17 V7iii Special
76 Convert
Half a V9 Roamer

Moto Guzzi - making electricians out of riders since March 15 1921

Offline Triple Jim

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 5930
    • Lakeland Services Company
  • Location: North Central North Carolina
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #541 on: January 19, 2016, 10:23:32 AM »
So you've been able to keep parking them there for now?
When the Brussels sprout fails to venture from its lair, it is time to roll a beaver up a grassy slope.

canuck750

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #542 on: January 19, 2016, 11:21:58 AM »
I showed my 1975 Moto Guzzi 750S3 at the International Motorcycle Show that was passing through town on the weekend. Standing by the display of vintage motorcycles I overheard a couple of guys commenting on the bikes. One of them was going on about Moto Guzzi, usual banter and then he said "this guy painted his bike just like the new ones Guzzi are selling" apparently referring to the orange striped S model of the V7 range.



I though of correcting him that actually Guzzi are adopting the 'original 1975' paint scheme to their new bike but thought better of it.

oldbike54

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #543 on: February 23, 2016, 01:00:13 PM »
 Last Tuesday gassing up the Jackal , guy drives up in a 90's Dodge minivan , asks if I want to trade . He doesn't want to accept no for an answer, and then , 'Heck  that is a V Max ?" After trying to explain that no , it's not a V Max , he says " well it says it's a V Max"  :huh: I just shrugged , and rode away before he could return after leaving the scene  :laugh:

 Dusty

Wildguzzi.com

Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #543 on: February 23, 2016, 01:00:13 PM »

twowings

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #544 on: February 23, 2016, 02:09:42 PM »
"I'm sorry, but we can't offer you a loan on the motorcycle...."

oldbike54

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #545 on: May 13, 2016, 07:37:14 AM »
 "I owned an EIGHT 50 Breva with paper head gaskets" , a letter in the latest MC'list mag .  :huh:

 Dusty

Offline Ronkom

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 1213
    • Virginia Moto Guzzi Owners Club
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #546 on: May 13, 2016, 08:14:49 AM »
I'm selling a nice Suzi DR650. Dude show up at the house w/money in hand, all excited. I start the bike, blast up the driveway to demo. Come back & shut it down. He says "Can you start it again so I can see how to do it?" After I comply he says, "And that changes the gears?" (pointing at the clutch lever). Bad vibe runs up my spine. I question "Have you taken the Motorcycle Safety Course?" "No". "Do you have a motorcycle drivers license?" "No" "Have you ever ridden a motorcycle?" "No".........Flabbergas ted I say "Well just how are you going to get the bike home" (to Roanoke Va. about 60 miles) "I figured I'd just learn by riding it"....there was more, but Long Story Short. I told him the only way he was taking the bike off my property was on a trailer. STRONGLY advised him tp take the course etc. etc. He came back a couple days later...w/a trailer....and then I had to loan him tie downs!
  Heard from him about a year later, he was selling the bike & wanted to know if I had a "copy of the title" (he'd lost it). So, he'd survived, I'd say there might be something to the old adage about god looking after fools & drunks.
ronkom
THE MOTRESYKLMAN
 Restore, Repair, Accessorize, Buy, Sell & Trade Exotic, Unusual, or Interesting Motorcycles. Guzzi Wrench 35+ years

Online rocker59

  • Global Moderator
  • Gaggle Hero
  • *
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 24010
  • "diplomatico di moto"
  • Location: NW Arkansas
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #547 on: May 13, 2016, 08:19:52 AM »
"I'm sorry, but we can't offer you a loan on the motorcycle...."

I had a bank tell me that one time.  I transferred all my money to a new bank PDQ.
Michael T.
Aux Arcs de Akansea
2004 California EV Touring II
"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." - Theodore Roosevelt

Offline Chuck in Indiana

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 29445
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #548 on: May 13, 2016, 09:10:54 AM »
Just yesterday, from a Harley guy.. seemed like a decent sort. "Boy, I like those Guzzis. Did you know they started as a helicopter engine?"
Chuck in (Elwood) Indiana/sometimes SoCal
 
87 AeroLario
95 Skorpion tour
22 Royal Enfield Classic 3 fiddy
 "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Albert Einstein

oldbike54

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #549 on: May 13, 2016, 09:24:27 AM »
Just yesterday, from a Harley guy.. seemed like a decent sort. "Boy, I like those Guzzis. Did you know they started as a helicopter engine?"

 MV Agusta , Moto Guzzi , maybe he is a bit confused  :laugh: Had a guy argue with me that Triumphs were built in Italy , and another guy swear up and down that MZ Agusta was a division of MV Agusta  :huh: :huh: Damn tricky European motorcycle companies confusing us with all of these names that are so similar  :rolleyes:

kirby1923

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #550 on: May 13, 2016, 10:04:59 AM »
Many years ago I sold a 650cc thunderbird to an Indian (native) for $300 in west tx. He showed up in an old pickup and as we were loading it (it ran fine), he ask me if I would check him out 'cause he had never ridden a motorcycle!

Spent the rest of the afternoon giving lessons.

Then loaded and left, always wondered what happened to that lad?

But that is not as bad as the guy I sold a Stearman to that had never flown an aircraft...I just couldn't do it.
He was very confident that he could indeed fly it.

I finally said "if you can start it', its yours"

Didn't happen.

Offline Chuck in Indiana

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 29445
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #551 on: May 13, 2016, 11:50:49 AM »
Quote
I finally said "if you can start it', its yours"

 :smiley: :smiley: "Yeah, I can fly these things.. just show me how to get er started.."
Chuck in (Elwood) Indiana/sometimes SoCal
 
87 AeroLario
95 Skorpion tour
22 Royal Enfield Classic 3 fiddy
 "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Albert Einstein

Red Dog

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #552 on: May 13, 2016, 12:05:22 PM »
I'm selling a nice Suzi DR650. Dude show up at the house w/money in hand, all excited. I start the bike, blast up the driveway to demo. Come back & shut it down. He says "Can you start it again so I can see how to do it?" After I comply he says, "And that changes the gears?" (pointing at the clutch lever). Bad vibe runs up my spine. I question "Have you taken the Motorcycle Safety Course?" "No". "Do you have a motorcycle drivers license?" "No" "Have you ever ridden a motorcycle?" "No".........Flabbergas ted I say "Well just how are you going to get the bike home" (to Roanoke Va. about 60 miles) "I figured I'd just learn by riding it"....there was more, but Long Story Short. I told him the only way he was taking the bike off my property was on a trailer. STRONGLY advised him tp take the course etc. etc. He came back a couple days later...w/a trailer....and then I had to loan him tie downs!
  Heard from him about a year later, he was selling the bike & wanted to know if I had a "copy of the title" (he'd lost it). So, he'd survived, I'd say there might be something to the old adage about god looking after fools & drunks.
ronkom

Same thing.  I was selling a 2015 Victory Gunner & the Kid drove 4.5 hours to buy the bike.  First thing I had told him CASH ONLY so he brings a check drawn on some Govt bank because he is military.  I call the bank & verify that all is good.  Then the kid starts asking me about the owners manual which is sitting on the hood of my wife's car.  I ask him does he want to hear it run & he starts asking me questions about shifting.  I ain't the brightest guy but I finally figure out he's never ridden a bike.  Go Home Kid.

Red Dog

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #553 on: May 13, 2016, 12:07:07 PM »
Why do you need more than one motorcycle?

Good question.  My wife used to ask me that all the time.

Offline Rox

  • What's a Goozy?
  • Hatchling
  • **
  • Posts: 189
  • Location: SoCal
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #554 on: May 13, 2016, 04:52:38 PM »
MV Agusta , Moto Guzzi , maybe he is a bit confused  :laugh: Had a guy argue with me that Triumphs were built in Italy , and another guy swear up and down that MZ Agusta was a division of MV Agusta  :huh: :huh: Damn tricky European motorcycle companies confusing us with all of these names that are so similar  :rolleyes:

Bill Murray once said: " It's difficult to win an argument with a smart person but it is damn near impossible to win an argument with a stupid person".  :bike-037:

  I used to correct people but have just given up. I too sat at a bike show and heard a guy say looking at a guy's 1000 Sport and say the guy copied  the pain from a V7. I tried to correct him but he insisted I was full of sh!t. I wanted to throw my helmet at him . You can't fix stupid .
02 V11 Lemans
02 V11 Scura
14 Honda CTX1300
07 Yamaha R6

Offline johnr

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 4343
  • Location: Invercargill NZ
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #555 on: May 14, 2016, 01:19:07 AM »


I finally said "if you can start it', its yours"

Didn't happen.

When I had my BSA Rocket 3 I was often asked by people if they could take it for a ride. (They were always rare and special, and heavy for their day) I would say something similar. I would tell them that if they could pick it up they could take it for a ride, and then carefully lay it on it's side. No one got that ride :grin:  But of course I never made that offer to anyone I thought had even a remote chance of succeeding.
New Zealand
2002 Ev tourer (Stalled again...)

Offline Sasquatch Jim

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9600
  • Sidecar - Best drive by shooting vehicle ever
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #556 on: May 14, 2016, 02:47:36 AM »
         Back in the day, how often have you heard that?, When I had a Matchless 500 single, A lot of guys asked to ride it.  I told them if they could start it okay.
  I didn't want to have to go retrieve it if the engine died on them and they couldn't restart it.
 No one ever got to ride it.  You had to be intimately involved to start it.  You had to retard the spark, With the kill button held down and the compression release held down, you stroke it through twice to clear the cylinder.
 If the engine was cold you held down on the carb tickler until a bit of gas weeped out under the tickler button.
 Set it at what ever choke you knew to be correct for the ambient temp.  Set the piston at TDC at the top of the exhaust stroke.  bounce your body up and snap hard down on the kick lever after releasing the kill button and compression release.  If the gods of big singles favored you it would chuff then begin to tick over weakly until you opened the throttle a bt andadvnced the spark half way.  Then it would tick over smoothly to the amazement of onlookers, some of whom may have suffered exhaustion or leg injury trying to start it.  Open the choke all the way.  After a bit of warm up, twist open the throttle while advancing the spark as the engine gained RPM, and torque away from the group smoothly as the exhaust bop bop bopped behind you.
 And Oh the way that bike could corner!
Sasquatch Jim        Humanoid, sort of.

Offline johnr

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 4343
  • Location: Invercargill NZ
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #557 on: May 15, 2016, 10:40:11 AM »
Designed for tight curly English country lanes Jim.
New Zealand
2002 Ev tourer (Stalled again...)

Offline rodekyll

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 21219
  • Not my real name
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #558 on: May 27, 2016, 04:00:35 PM »
I just saw my retired doctor at the grocery store.  "Why aren't you riding your bike?" she asked.
     "No Headlights"  Says I.
"Why is that a problem?" Quoth she.
     "Can't run a bike without headlights."
"You need head lice to ride a motorcycle?   Ewww!"




(insert sticking icepick into eye smarm here)

oldbike54

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #559 on: May 27, 2016, 04:03:11 PM »
 OH HELL  :shocked: :laugh:

 Dusty

Offline Dukedesmo

  • Gaggle Mentor
  • ****
  • Posts: 528
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #560 on: May 27, 2016, 04:44:14 PM »
When I got my first bike, my Grandma told me to be careful and so as to not ride too quickly to 'stay in first gear'...
Le Mans II
Ducati 916
Ducati M900

Offline rodekyll

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 21219
  • Not my real name
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #561 on: May 28, 2016, 06:28:55 PM »
Another "current" topic reminds me of a phone call I got from a kid I know with a vintage UJM.  He was converting his turn lights to LED and had the spastic flasher problem.  I explained the need for the three-lug flasher unit and how the lugs were marked.  He called back a few days later saying "I got the flasher unit, but I can only make out the markings on two of the three lugs.  What do I do now?"   :shocked:

I wanted to tell him to return the flasher and sell the bike before it runs out of gas and leaves him stranded.

Offline BertoGuzzi17

  • New Egg
  • *
  • Posts: 15
  • Location: New York,NY
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #562 on: May 30, 2016, 06:24:07 PM »
I went out today to grab a coffee this morning and just got lucky and found a parking spot right in front of the coffee shop so I pulled up to a parking spot and backed the bike up into the spot. Grabbed my coffee and sat outside the shop. Then I had someone that obviously saw me pull me give me a nice compliment about the Moto Guzzi. He said he never heard of them before but then asked me about shifting gears and after I explained how to get to 1st then Neutral and go up.

He was "Wow - no kidding, but how do you put your bike into reverse. - Where is the reverse gear ?"

It took me a second to answer and almost choked on my coffee - but I gently explained to him there was no reverse gear. He was blown away!
« Last Edit: May 30, 2016, 06:43:25 PM by oldbike54 »

Offline Sasquatch Jim

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 9600
  • Sidecar - Best drive by shooting vehicle ever
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #563 on: May 30, 2016, 08:05:58 PM »
All exept two of my bikes have had gravity reverse.  I swing around stopping them bow pointed uphil.
Reverse is easy that way.  Both my Russian bikes had a reverse gear in the tranny.
Sasquatch Jim        Humanoid, sort of.

Offline giusto

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 1220
  • Giusto il canne del Como
    • photobucket
  • Location: Traverse City Michigan
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #564 on: May 30, 2016, 08:28:50 PM »
STUPID OUGHTA HURT


well come to think of it...sometimes it does...ie: Darwin award winners
2020 V 85 TT Travel
76 V1000 Convert Mr. Slate
76 V1000 Convert...in restoration process
2008 Norge Mia
2007 Breva
66 Benelli 125
68 Gilera 106
è il viaggio non la destinazione che è importante

oldbike54

  • Guest
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #565 on: May 30, 2016, 09:21:15 PM »
 What a great thread , who started ... oh , never mind  :grin:

 Dusty

Offline charlie b

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 6941
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #566 on: May 31, 2016, 07:50:29 AM »
I am one of those who always puts the bike in neutral.  Sorry, but, I feel the chances of being rear ended are small enough that I don't worry about it.

Yes, you can now post about all the people you know or heard about being killed from a rear impact.
1984 850 T5 (sold)
2009 Dodge Cummins 2500

Offline Guzzistajohn

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 12374
  • Location: Missouri Ozarks
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #567 on: May 31, 2016, 09:22:35 AM »
I was getting gas the other day on the CX and 3 HD dudes were gazing at their cell phones trying to figure out where they were, I noticed they had Illinois tags and asked if I could help. They wanted to get off the 4 lane and on to MO 125 south to the Ark. line for a ferry ride across Bull Shoals lake.

One of the guys actually turned, looked at the CX and said "What in the hell is that????"


I took them to 125 and pointed them in the right direction :bike-037:


(my good deed for the day)
ебать Россию!   Not anti social-pro solitude

Offline n3303j

  • Ron Cichowski
  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 1600
  • Location: Eastern Massachusetts
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #568 on: May 31, 2016, 09:27:20 AM »
This one came from my own Dear Wife:

"You really don't need four motorcycles!"

Still don't understand where she got that idea.
New neighbor has eleven (0 on his wife count).
'98 MG V11 EV
'96 URAL SPORTSMAN
'77 MG 850T3 FB

Offline johnr

  • Gaggle Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 4343
  • Location: Invercargill NZ
Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #569 on: May 31, 2016, 11:01:53 AM »
"I had no choice but to lay the bike down - that's the fastest way to stop a bike, ya know."

I know it's a re-run but I still can't believe anyone is dumb enough to believe this.

Which bit are we not to believe bob?  :evil:
New Zealand
2002 Ev tourer (Stalled again...)

 

***Wildguzzi Official Logo High Quality 5 Color Window Decals Back In Stock***
Shipping in USA Only. Awesome quality. Back by popular demand. All proceeds go back into the forum.
http://www.wildguzzi.com/Products/products.htm
Advertise Here