Author Topic: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles  (Read 236305 times)

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #90 on: June 30, 2013, 08:03:23 PM »
So I am at the C-store late afternoon , old beater /5 just sitting their minding her own business , me with a refreshing beverage , young man on some small cruiser bike rolls up , flip flops , shorts , doo rag . He says " cool bike , but why doncha take them saddlebags and windshield off , be a lot cooler thata way ". I just smile and tell him it makes it more useful . When he remounts his bike with a bag of ice and a 12 pack of something balanced precariously in his lap , I watch with a tiny smile on my face as he proceeds to lose his cargo while re entering the street , pop and ice everywhere , but no damage to the MC or rider . As I am helping him gather up his stuff he says " your bike would be so much cooler w/o that stuff on it " . What could I say ?
Dusty

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #91 on: July 12, 2013, 02:07:20 PM »
Scene : Maysville Ar , C-store , Time 8AM Sunday morning . Dialogue : How did you get that Volkswagon motor in that motorcycle ?
Dusty

Offline youcanrunnaked

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #92 on: July 12, 2013, 02:12:16 PM »
As I am helping him gather up his stuff he says " your bike would be so much cooler w/o that stuff on it " . What could I say ?


"Are you that much cooler with ice in your lap?"
"The transverse vibration is a great sensation -- hey, I think I just wrote a song!"
-- Billy Joel, Motorcyclist, 02/2012

"If Moto Guzzi were any more of a cult, you'd need a chicken."
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Offline wheaties

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #93 on: July 12, 2013, 06:46:01 PM »
Scene : Maysville Ar , C-store , Time 8AM Sunday morning . Dialogue : How did you get that Volkswagon motor in that motorcycle ?
Dusty

"This engine didn't come out of a Volkswagon, it came out of a Morgan..."
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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #93 on: July 12, 2013, 06:46:01 PM »

Offline Air-Cooled

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #94 on: July 12, 2013, 09:06:16 PM »
I owned a Smart Car for about a year, and the following conversation happened with several people on different occasions. The narrative was almost exactly the same each time:

"Is that your car?"

"Yep"

"Do you feel safe in it?"

"Yep"

"Really?

"Yep"

"I don't know how you feel safe in that."

"Well, you know I ride a motorcycle don't you?"

"Oh, yes."

"Well, I feel comfortable on the bike and I think the car is a little safer than the bike."

"Hmmm....yeah, but that's different."

 ::)
« Last Edit: July 12, 2013, 09:07:04 PM by Air-Cooled »
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Offline Denis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #95 on: July 13, 2013, 12:32:24 PM »
This is such a target rich thread!
When I worked for the Guzzi dealer:
Them: What kinda Hondas are these?
Patient Employee: Moto Guzzi
Them: Cool! I like Jap(anese) bikes.
Patient Employee: They are made in Italy.
Them: Where in Japan is Italy?


Remember we were loading up O.D.'s 85th anniversary Electraglide and some kid walking by asked "Where in Japan is that made?"
Show me a Le Mans IV and I'll show you a Le Mans 1000.
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Offline Lannis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #96 on: July 13, 2013, 12:55:09 PM »
OH MY , some reverse bike bigotry . ;D
Dusty

Ah, ah, ah ... you're giving yourself away.   There's no such thing as "reverse bigotry"!   

Although it IS an unusual thing for a kid to say ....

Lannis
"Hard pounding, this, gentlemen; let's see who pounds the longest".

Offline Lannis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #97 on: July 13, 2013, 03:30:22 PM »
A simple colloquialism , like torquey .
Dusty

Between metaphors, allegories, and colloquialisms, it's hard to guess at what anyone's saying any more .....

Lannis
"Hard pounding, this, gentlemen; let's see who pounds the longest".

Offline rodekyll

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #98 on: July 21, 2013, 04:14:49 PM »
I was getting a propane tank filled and a really fast-looking ujm pulled up for a drink.  I asked the rider how he liked it, and he went on and on about custom exhaust and intake filters, suspension and tire improvements and other mods he'd done.  After listing a bunch of bolt-on bling details (he especially liked the turn signals housed in the mirrors) he stopped me cold by saying:

"And it's got 30mph more top end than it did before the engine mods!"

I hadn't heard him mention anything about changing gear ratios, so I asked him about his gearbox and sprockets.

"My dyno guy said they were strong enough so I didn't change them."

"Well, keep your wheels down" I said, and took my propane tanks home.

Offline nsmith

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #99 on: July 21, 2013, 05:36:21 PM »
Little brother called to tell me "I bought a Harley"
Neil formally from South Dakota now living it up in Arkansas

Offline Lannis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #100 on: July 21, 2013, 05:47:27 PM »
Little brother called to tell me "I bought a Harley"

What kind of Harley was it?   Yamaha?  Honda?  Ninja?
« Last Edit: July 21, 2013, 05:47:49 PM by Lannis »
"Hard pounding, this, gentlemen; let's see who pounds the longest".

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #101 on: July 26, 2013, 09:41:13 PM »
Let me preface what I am going to say . The young man who said this in the form of a question regarding my old beater /5 was very nice and had a genuine interest in learning about the bike . "Are those the original tires ?" . No I responded in a serious voice , probably the 20th or so set .
Dusty

Offline Lannis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #102 on: July 26, 2013, 10:02:29 PM »
Let me preface what I am going to say . The young man who said this in the form of a question regarding my old beater /5 was very nice and had a genuine interest in learning about the bike . "Are those the original tires ?" . No I responded in a serious voice , probably the 20th or so set .
Dusty

Not an unreasonable question.   My brother bought a new Toyota Celica in the 80s when he got out of the service.   95,000 miles later, he got the car inspected and sold it, with the original tires on it .... Yokohamas, I think.   

So maybe the lad was a Toyota driver .... ?

Lannis
"Hard pounding, this, gentlemen; let's see who pounds the longest".

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #103 on: July 26, 2013, 10:16:59 PM »
Yoko Hamas , is that the Japanese chick who broke up the Beatles , or a Japanese/middle Eastern terrorist group ?Excuse me , political organization .
Dusty

Offline Lannis

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #104 on: July 26, 2013, 10:24:42 PM »
Yoko Hamas , is that the Japanese chick who broke up the Beatles , or a Japanese/middle Eastern terrorist group ?Excuse me , political organization .
Dusty

Ba dum DUM!  Don't mind me, I'm just the straight man ....
"Hard pounding, this, gentlemen; let's see who pounds the longest".

Offline cwiseman

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #105 on: July 26, 2013, 10:52:28 PM »
The stories are plenty wild when you hear what an old Kawasaki triple was capable of in the 70's
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oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #106 on: July 26, 2013, 11:03:35 PM »
The stories are plenty wild when you hear what an old Kawasaki triple was capable of in the 70's
Tell us please . :D
Dusty

gclark8

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #107 on: July 26, 2013, 11:32:21 PM »
What do you call a blind deer?

No idea.

What do call a blind dead deer?

Still no idea.

What do you call a blind, dead, castrated deer?

A still no-f..king eye deer!  

 :beat_horse


Edit: Oops, wrong topic..  :-[
« Last Edit: July 26, 2013, 11:35:40 PM by gclark8 »

Offline johnr

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #108 on: July 27, 2013, 01:52:26 AM »
Tell us please . :D
Dusty

OK Here's a bit..
The kawasaki Mk3 was touted as "The fastest bike in the world" by the manufacturers. This was down to it's 1/4 mile result.
It's top speed was purportedly 125mph, which is unlikely to be realistic because of the Japanese practice, at the time of quoting the fastest speed ever achieved. They got this  'top speed' by using a (small) Japanese man lying with his head sideways on the tank, one hand on one of the forks (to steer) and the other along his side. A one way run was all that was required (Downhill with a tail wind? Definitely the tail wind anyway.)  True story! I've seen photos of them doing it.  Not an attainable speed by the average rider.

(Have a nice memory of blasting past one in a bit of a race on the R3. I had, an admittedly small, passenger on too.)
« Last Edit: July 27, 2013, 01:57:02 AM by johnr »
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gclark8

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #109 on: July 27, 2013, 02:39:03 AM »
Back in the '60s, my Honda CB450 had a published top speed of 112mph with 15/35 gearing.
I regularly achieved speeds of 135mph with 16/35 gearing down the hot-mix mineshaft, more famously known as Conrod Straight.
 :bike
Slowing down for Murray's Corner with drum brakes was another thing entirely!   ::)
« Last Edit: July 27, 2013, 02:44:11 AM by gclark8 »

Offline cwiseman

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #110 on: July 27, 2013, 08:44:45 AM »
Nearly anytime I ride one of my 2-stroke triples the crazies come out of the woodwork. It's always my brother, cousin, some crazy friend ect had one of those back in the day and it could wheelie in 5th, top speed of 150, on and on and on. Oh ya and the myth that they can't handle a curve. I have found them to handle as well as most bike that size from that time.
Moto Guzzi Robinson/C & D Motorsports
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Moto Guzzi dealer in South Eastern Illinois
Personal rides 2007 Calvin, 72 Eldo, V7 Classic, 75 RD350, GasGas Pampera 250 + a few others
2-stroke street bike enthusiast

Offline nsmith

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #111 on: July 27, 2013, 09:37:53 AM »
I know first hand that a 1975 750 H2 with two full size men on board (and 5th gear not working) can show @120mph on the speedo. It can out run a 1983 Killeen Tx cop car (but not a road block) and cost somewere in the neighborhood of $350.00. Sad to say they never got a good fix on my speed. Called it exesive and eluding. To tell the truth I didn't know I was being chased for the first 4-5miles, after that what the hell I was already buying a ticket. Might as well make a memory.
Neil formally from South Dakota now living it up in Arkansas

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #112 on: July 27, 2013, 09:43:55 AM »
Now we are cooking . Probably more mythology surrounding Vincents , and Big Ks triples than any other models. Recently a young fella told me his Dad had a 750 Kawasaki , the model that our govt. outlawed because 1/2 of new owners got killed on them . When I suggested the real issue was emissions and the introduction of faster more sophisticated 4 strokes from the big 4 , he seemed a bit confused .  
Dusty
Not calling BS on the above post .
« Last Edit: July 27, 2013, 09:53:53 AM by oldbike54 »

Offline nsmith

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #113 on: July 27, 2013, 10:59:29 AM »
Just remember I said the bike showed 120 mph I truly have know idea how fast I was goin that is why it would have been nice to have an official note from the police on how fast I was goin that day. Keep in mind this happend two weeks after I got married to a girl I first met two weeks earlier. And shes still hangin around. She says living with me there is never a dull monent.
Neil formally from South Dakota now living it up in Arkansas

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #114 on: July 27, 2013, 11:08:50 AM »
Neil ,
 :D I posted before reading your post , that was why I said not calling BS . Yes , an indicated 120 is reasonable , and might I congratulate you on marrying the right girl . ;-T My adoptive sister used to passenger with me some , and her mantra was " Let's go fast , no I mean really fast ".
Dusty

Offline fatbob

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #115 on: July 27, 2013, 11:50:44 AM »
Maybe not , but some of the newer members might post . Here , just to prime the pump , whatever ya do , don't ever use the front brake , you'll flip over forwards.  Dusty

+ 1
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oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #116 on: July 27, 2013, 12:06:14 PM »
Maybe anecdotal , but along the lines of John R's last post . Late sixties the English Montesa importer was touting their latest 250 MXer to a journo , when asked how much HP the bike made the importer asked "how much is Bultaco claiming for their 250 ?" The journo told him 25 HP to which the importer replied "Well then ours makes 26 HP ." Even today manufacturers claimed HP and torque are usually higher than what real world Dyno testing reveals . 
Dusty

barenekd

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #117 on: July 27, 2013, 02:29:29 PM »
Quote
My father-in-law saying they are dangerous and please be careful when your out there . What do you say when your 64 and been riding since you were 16 ?

I tell them, "I've only been doing this for 50 years. I think I have it figured out!"
bare

oldbike54

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #118 on: July 27, 2013, 02:55:31 PM »
I tell them, "I've only been doing this for 50 years. I think I have it figured out!"
bare
At least he does not say , " hey , go out there and get ran over would ya , didn't like ya when you married my daughter , still don't like ya ." ;D
Dusty

winger

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Re: The stupidest thing anyone ever said to you regarding motorcycles
« Reply #119 on: July 27, 2013, 06:43:27 PM »
A guy I work with was telling me about his cousin's bike. You know an early Yamaha  with the Triumph motor.

Winger

 

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