Wildguzzi.com

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: SmithSwede on May 18, 2021, 06:15:09 PM

Title: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: SmithSwede on May 18, 2021, 06:15:09 PM
A highly entertaining poll.   Thoughts?  What animals have you personally battled unarmed, and what was the outcome?

I personally think zero humans could win a fight against an adult male chimpanzee.   I was once grabbed by a teenaged chimp and learned they are freakishly strong. 

What is wrong with the 7% of men who think they could win an unarmed battle with a grizzly bear?    ???

https://today.yougov.com/topics/lifestyle/articles-reports/2021/05/13/lions-and-tigers-and-bears-what-animal-would-win-f
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Moto Vita on May 18, 2021, 06:19:15 PM
 Because we are humans we can arm ourselves as necessary, for now.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: SmithSwede on May 18, 2021, 06:20:19 PM
Sure.  But assume you are completely unarmed. 

Could you take a honey badger?
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Guzzistajohn on May 18, 2021, 06:36:13 PM
My hamster turned on me when I was 9 or 10. It was quite a scrap.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: ozarquebus on May 18, 2021, 06:52:26 PM
 Me, a honey badger? no way unless I don't get fed on time.

I am sure I could at least fight a chimp to a draw, if it was a battle of wits.

My uncle Jake in Anchorage defeated a black bear in his living room with an O-Cedar broom, but I guess that was not actually unarmed. It wasn't a question who was most sober, it was who was angrier. The trusty .30-06 was at hand, but it would have made a big mess and would not have been very sporting for the bear.

Me, I once defeated a very pesky giant hornet bare handed. It was so close I could see a hundred reflections of myself in its eyes.
(https://i.ibb.co/Jvp9MsP/Getty-Images-156720700-0.webp) (https://ibb.co/Jvp9MsP)

host image online free (https://imgbb.com/)


Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: oldbike54 on May 18, 2021, 06:59:33 PM
 A Banty Hen sitting eggs once kicked my ass , so something less ferocious than a 2 lb Banty Hen .

 Dusty
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Tkelly on May 18, 2021, 07:25:50 PM
On one of those animal attackshows a young guy described fighting off a pack of coyotes in the dark in Colorado as he walked to work.He would body slam them as they went for his throat .Whenthey couldn’t get him down they quit.No video but he had the wounds to show for it.If you allow spears the Eskimos and northern natives killed polar and grizzly bears up until modern times.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: John A on May 18, 2021, 07:46:28 PM
A mountain lion walked in front of me about a hundred yards from my house when I lived on the Mt Baker hiway one morning. He looked me over like he was sizing up a snack, I was happy I was in a car. He was over the height of the hood on a ‘64 chev.  Here in WI I shot a very large raccoon in the backyard because he wouldn’t go away and showed no fear . I was worried about it hurting my dog so I emptied a pistol on him, eight shots .22 long rifle all head shots. I hated to destroy him but he might have been sick so I washed the entire area so in case he had rabies the dog, a 12 pounder, wouldn’t get sick. I wouldn’t want to tangle with that big sucker
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: fubar guzzi on May 18, 2021, 08:02:09 PM
      :popcorn:    I tangled with a ground hog one time,I killed him-----only cause I could   :popcorn:   now I don't kill ANYTHING,I figure we all have a wright to life on this planet----aaaaaaaaaaall lives matter    jus sayin  (most anyway)    :thumb:
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Guzzistajohn on May 18, 2021, 08:02:30 PM
When I was in homecare one of my patients, Marge Lambert started looking me up and down from her home hospital bed like a wild animal that just set eyes on a platter of porkchops. I ran like hell.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: SmithSwede on May 18, 2021, 08:05:39 PM
.If you allow spears the Eskimos and northern natives killed polar and grizzly bears up until modern times.

Yes, the “unarmed” part is crucial to the exercise.  I suspect that ancient humans, hunting in packs, with nothing but pointy spears and knives, probably killed mammoths and other mega-fauna on a regular basis.  Probably drove many extinct. 

Think the Plains Indians and the buffalo.    It’s no big deal to shoot one from 200 yards in a railroad car with a .45-70.  But can you imagine grappling with one using rocks and pointy sticks?

Back to the question.  I think if you go by weight, nothing beats wasps, hornets, bees or the like.   Few want to tangle with them, even if the entire swarm weights less than 10 ounces.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: LowRyter on May 18, 2021, 08:09:22 PM
I could turn off the aquarium air pump. 

Then I'd have to clean real freakin' mess.   :angry:
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Gliderjohn on May 18, 2021, 08:18:16 PM
Well is this considered unarmed? I took on a blacksnake that was trying to raid a bluebird nest with a running garden hose. It was quite a fight with me having to get within about two feet of it directly spraying it's head before it finally gave up and left the tree.
GliderJohn
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: LowRyter on May 18, 2021, 08:35:31 PM
John, sounds like deja vu. 

All over again. 
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Turin on May 18, 2021, 09:09:31 PM
I'd be willing to square off with a Duck Billed Platypus.

(https://i.ibb.co/SrQdS3b/platypus.jpg) (https://ibb.co/SrQdS3b)
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: ozarquebus on May 18, 2021, 11:07:20 PM
 Pretty amazing waht a difference a pointy stick improves over unarmed.

ie: Packs of early hominids defeating 2000 pound bears & giant Wooley Mammoths with a bunch of sharp sticks?

"You go first, Gork!" (the bravest did not reproduce)

Yes, I have often wondered about early mans' & womans' impact on the extinction of the mega fauna...or was it that Younger Dryas event?
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Shorty on May 18, 2021, 11:07:29 PM
All good cat stories begin with a pair of welding gloves.  :wink: 
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: wymple on May 19, 2021, 12:32:26 AM
I'd be willing to square off with a Duck Billed Platypus.

(https://i.ibb.co/SrQdS3b/platypus.jpg) (https://ibb.co/SrQdS3b)


They have poisonous venom barbs. Very painful.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: SIR REAL ED on May 19, 2021, 04:49:56 AM
Pretty amazing waht a difference a pointy stick improves over unarmed.

ie: Packs of early hominids defeating 2000 pound bears & giant Wooley Mammoths with a bunch of sharp sticks?

"You go first, Gork!" (the bravest did not reproduce)

Yes, I have often wondered about early mans' & womans' impact on the extinction of the mega fauna...or was it that Younger Dryas event?

After listening to a couple of podcasts of Joe Rogan interviewing Randall Carson, I would vote on the Younger Dryas event as the cause of extinction.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Murray on May 19, 2021, 06:55:05 AM
They have poisonous venom barbs. Very painful.

Which modern pain killers don't work on, although it's only the males.

One of the hairless apes evolutionary traits is it ability to sweat and its endurance to either hunt or bravely run away. Although fight? put them off till they decide you are not worth it, bravely running away might be all that it takes.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: cliffrod on May 19, 2021, 07:09:51 AM
Ask a bunch of ATGATT advocates how much pain, blood and mutilation they're willing to voluntarily endure... 

To be fair, the query says what animal- not animals...  Fighting a single animal is a completely different situation than fighting many animals at the same time.   Without claws, fangs & shearing teeth, horns or venom with the specific anatomical structures & musculature to efficiently employ them, humans are often at a significant disadvantage if they do not use their advanced intelligence and opposable thumbs to employ tools to compensate.   

Regardless of these details, many fights are won in spite of how much it hurts or costs.  That's how animals fight because that's how they survive.  Blind rage to instill the fear of death into the opponent.  The only thing they're trying to prove is who is in charge and who is not.  If you are not instantly willing to go 100% to the mat like an animal and fight without reserve like your life depends upon it,  fighting is probably not be your best choice
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: wavedog on May 19, 2021, 07:45:06 AM
I could not best any animal in a fight at my age. A little over a year ago I was attacked by a very large Rottweiler. There is a nice 4” scar on my leg now. I did get in a couple good kicks to its head and it backed off enough for its owners to gain control. The artery in my leg was nicked and the amount of blood pumped out was impressive.

So, the human brain is our most important asset for survival. Make tools and weapons and keep those wild animals at a distance. Situational awareness.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: larrys on May 19, 2021, 09:05:29 AM
Chimpanzees are way stronger than humans. A number of years ago a woman in CT was almost killed by one. It bit off her hands and face, and blinded her. She was one of the first recipients in the US for a full face transplant. My cat Boris would kick my ass.
Larry
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Mayor_of_BBQ on May 19, 2021, 09:16:44 AM
I think these people are seriously underestimating the size, speed, and agility of a king cobra and certainly of a chimp. A chimp could pound you bloody in the blink of an eye! Anyone who said Grizzly or polar bear is deluded as well. A grizzly would tear you to ribbons and a polar bear would stand on your head and eat your backstrap out while you are still kicking.

I could whoop a solo wolf no problem tho!  :boxing:
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: RHAT on May 19, 2021, 09:20:17 AM
I have never been so quickly and so thoroughly whipped as the day I bent down to pick up a tiny little kitten.  I might as well stuck my hand in the blender.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: oldbike54 on May 19, 2021, 09:32:18 AM
I have never been so quickly and so thoroughly whipped as the day I bent down to pick up a tiny little kitten.  I might as well stuck my hand in the blender.

 Oh man yes , and kittens are sneaky .

 Dusty
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: JC85 on May 19, 2021, 11:57:59 AM
A friend recently shared this is a group chat. Apparently, a fair number of males know absolutely nothing about chimp physiology. Otherwise, they wouldn't be nearly so confident.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: tazio on May 19, 2021, 12:06:35 PM
I kicked some big gorilla in the nuts one time.
He went down like a sack of taters.  :afro:
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Alfetta on May 19, 2021, 12:43:08 PM
i would not recommend trying to best a tape worm
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Stormtruck2 on May 19, 2021, 05:45:05 PM
Any animal unless it is a female.  Never won a fight with a female anything.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: grebmrof on May 19, 2021, 05:55:15 PM
A small turtle...
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: John A on May 19, 2021, 07:38:04 PM
What about gators? I used to watch Tarzan do it most Saturdays when I was a kid and it didn’t look too hard. Tarzan always won....
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: oldbike54 on May 19, 2021, 07:46:35 PM
What about gators? I used to watch Tarzan do it most Saturdays when I was a kid and it didn’t look too hard. Tarzan always won....

 Ever wonder why Tarzan yelled so often , well ...

 Dusty
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: John A on May 19, 2021, 07:53:44 PM
It was a high pitched yell, wasn’t it?
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Gliderjohn on May 19, 2021, 08:14:17 PM
From my recolactions Tarzan's wounds after wrestling a lion to death were less than I have had trying to give one of my cats a pill.
GliderJohn
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: krglorioso on May 19, 2021, 10:13:15 PM

Think the Plains Indians and the buffalo.    It’s no big deal to shoot one from 200 yards in a railroad car with a .45-70.  But can you imagine grappling with one using rocks and pointy sticks?"

It depends on how hungry I am.

Ralph
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: SmithSwede on May 19, 2021, 10:27:28 PM

Think the Plains Indians and the buffalo.    It’s no big deal to shoot one from 200 yards in a railroad car with a .45-70.  But can you imagine grappling with one using rocks and pointy sticks?"

It depends on how hungry I am.

Ralph

No matter how it ends, you won’t be hungry any more!
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: wavedog on May 20, 2021, 07:44:41 AM
 The First Nation people were smart enough to not confront a buffalo until they had bow and arrow and later horses. Before the bow they used to drive them over cliffs. Buffalo Jump. Still very dangerous. Yeah in those days I would have been very hungry. Buffalo are big and unpredictable and I am basically a Python "run away" kind of guy.
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Mayor_of_BBQ on May 20, 2021, 12:54:51 PM
The First Nation people were smart enough to not confront a buffalo until they had bow and arrow and later horses. Before the bow they used to drive them over cliffs. Buffalo Jump. Still very dangerous. Yeah in those days I would have been very hungry. Buffalo are big and unpredictable and I am basically a Python "run away" kind of guy.

The Ulm Pishkun (First People's Buffalo Jump) in west/central Montana is one of the crazy coolest things I have ever seen...  Thinking about the young scouts crawling thru the grasses in wolf skins, charging a herd of buffalo with nothing but the sound of your voice and a pointy stick for a weapon...  The planning and effort of rolling the boulders in position on the causeway to form the big V...  and the thought that if the herd zigs when you meant them to zag; might mean they veer off and your tribe missed out on the biggest meal payday of the year..  It was a very powerful place to me. 
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Guzzi Gal on May 20, 2021, 02:12:56 PM
A coyote, if I have to. I routinely chase them off a baseball bat when a primal yell will do. I'd throw down bare-handed to protect one of my babies against one, though. :thewife:
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Moto Vita on May 20, 2021, 02:35:34 PM
 Ask this guy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr1idLs-zPw
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Rough Edge racing on May 20, 2021, 02:49:04 PM
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
(Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
there's a man in the funny papers we all know (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He lived 'way back a long time ago (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
He don't eat nothin' but a bear cat stew (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
Well this cat's name is-a Alley Oop (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)

He got a chauffeur that's a genuine dinosawruh (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
And he can knuckle your head before you count to four-ath (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)

He got a big ugly club and a head full of hair-uh (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
Like great big lions and grizzly bear-uhs (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
(Alley Oop) He's the toughest man there is alive
(Alley Oop) Wearin' clothes from a wildcat's hide
(Alley Oop) He's the king of the jungle jive
(Look at that cave man go)

He rides through the jungle tearin' limbs off a trees (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
Knockin' great big monsta's dead on their knees (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
The cats don't bug him 'cause they know better (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)
'Cause he's a mean motah scootah and a bad go-getter (Alley Oop, oop, oop-oop)

(Alley Oop) He's the toughest man there is alive
(Alley Oop) Wearin' clothes from a wildcat's hide
(Alley Oop) He's the king of the jungle jive
(Look at that cave man go)

There he goes, look at that cave man go
He sure is hip ain't he?
Like what's happening?
He's too much
Ride, Daddy, ride
Hi-yo dinosawruh
Ride, Daddy, ride
Get 'em, man
Like, hipsville

 
     







   
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Moto Vita on May 24, 2021, 12:17:46 PM
https://thetrek.co/no-travis-kauffman-not-strangle-3-month-old-24-lb-starving-mountain-lion/
Title: Re: What animal could you beat in a fight while unarmed?
Post by: Perazzimx14 on May 24, 2021, 12:23:25 PM
"Unarmed" like the Black Knight I doubt I could whip much of anything.


(https://i.ibb.co/qY4Nv3r/Unarmed.jpg) (https://ibb.co/qY4Nv3r)