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General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: lucydad on May 17, 2015, 07:41:16 PM

Title: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: lucydad on May 17, 2015, 07:41:16 PM
All,

Tlaloc is the Aztec god of rain and fertility.  We have had way, way too much rain here on the Gulf Coast of Texas the past few months.  Oklahoma and Kansas have been hammered too.

Today another apocalypse moved through TEXAS-- and I congratulated myself on not getting on the Guzzi and riding to church. Tlaloc loves to drown motorcycle riders like rats in a sewer.  Flinging lightning is another past time.  Worst are tornadoes and hurricanes.

So, I am proposing a sacrifice to Tlaloc.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tlaloc

Since we need an inverse effect (dryer, less rain and lightning and tornadoes and hail), the typical prisoner or small child will not work.  We need instead old grumpy men that wear red suspenders.  

May I have a volunteer or two for the alter?  Think of the honor. Guaranteed also will be rain for California.   Tlaloc  (Chaac in Anasazi or Inca pantheon)  also provides abundant crops.

Yep, had enough.  Time for a sacrifice.  I can't imagine what hurricane season will be like without one of you fine gents stepping forward.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: lucydad on May 17, 2015, 07:53:40 PM
Dusty,

That may help.  BMW cage was bad enough on rain blinded/wind/lightning/flooding freeway...fed up with rain here.  Ground so saturated any event causes flooding now.  Read that El Nino has set up and we may stay in this pattern all year.  But the Nino is toxic to hurricanes? 
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: rodekyll on May 17, 2015, 07:55:30 PM
I volunteer Dusty.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: CalVin2007 on May 17, 2015, 08:16:34 PM
I volunteer Dusty.

   Yes....anyone named "dusty" should bring dry weather.  ;)

   Terry
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: normzone on May 17, 2015, 09:07:49 PM
I'm as flexible as the next guy when it comes to alternate deities, but isn't [Dusty] already earmarked to be raffled off for a flogging?

This Tlaloc guy seems to have been satisfied with trinkets most of the year anyway. I'm all for more rain for Cali, but can't we just use a chicken? Free range organic Rosie's ought to do it.

(EDIT) Bombay Sapphire and tonic on ice tonight...

 :BEER:
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: Yukonica on May 17, 2015, 09:25:19 PM
Would love to help out but my suspenders are Husqvarna orange. And I'm Canadian to boot .... you all know how bland we are.
No Aztec deity is going to munch down bland and be happy about it.
Sorry.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: rodekyll on May 17, 2015, 09:31:57 PM
I'm as flexible as the next guy when it comes to alternate deities, but isn't [Dusty] already earmarked to be raffled off for a flogging?

This Tlaloc guy seems to have been satisfied with trinkets most of the year anyway. I'm all for more rain for Cali, but can't we just use a chicken? Free range organic Rosie's ought to do it.

(EDIT) Bombay Sapphire and tonic on ice tonight...

 :BEER:

If we flogged him first and then sacrificed him (doesn't work the other way 'round) we'd be squeezing every jot from the turnip -- a sure sign to the goddess that the tribute comes from guzzisti.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: Late to the party on May 18, 2015, 09:46:16 AM
Would love to help out but my suspenders are Husqvarna orange. And I'm Canadian to boot .... you all know how bland we are.
No Aztec deity is going to munch down bland and be happy about it.
Sorry.


Never know, change of diet might do the old deity good.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: Chuck in Indiana on May 18, 2015, 11:04:05 AM
I'd do it, but I'm pretty sure you are supposed to use a virgin..
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: Sasquatch Jim on May 18, 2015, 11:51:01 AM
All,

Tlaloc is the Aztec god of rain and fertility.  We have had way, way too much rain here on the Gulf Coast of Texas the past few months.  Oklahoma and Kansas have been hammered too.

Today another apocalypse moved through TEXAS-- and I congratulated myself on not getting on the Guzzi and riding to church. Tlaloc loves to drown motorcycle riders like rats in a sewer.  Flinging lightning is another past time.  Worst are tornadoes and hurricanes.

So, I am proposing a sacrifice to Tlaloc.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tlaloc

Since we need an inverse effect (dryer, less rain and lightning and tornadoes and hail), the typical prisoner or small child will not work.  We need instead old grumpy men that wear red suspenders.  

May I have a volunteer or two for the alter?  Think of the honor. Guaranteed also will be rain for California.   Tlaloc  (Chaac in Anasazi or Inca pantheon)  also provides abundant crops.

Yep, had enough.  Time for a sacrifice.  I can't imagine what hurricane season will be like without one of you fine gents stepping forward.


   Does the sacrifice have to be virgin?
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: normzone on May 18, 2015, 12:09:59 PM
Let's review the specifics of the alleged threat:

" Just a thought here...

" Dusty is wheels up and headed for home and will be severely flogged if he shuts the bike down for any reason before he reaches his driveway "

Perhaps as a fundraiser for the forum we could raffle off the opportunity to severely flog Dusty. It's not my thing, but there's got to be somebody who would pay for the chance. "

The lawyer lobe of my brain doesn't really view this as threat level language. I concur that the villagers did reflexively seize pitchforks, and some old torches were waved about without being lit, due to having been in the not-California weather recently. But they do that routinely around here.
Title: Re: need some red suspendered volunteers...
Post by: normzone on May 18, 2015, 01:28:31 PM
That's perfect for me, my idea of riding weather is cool and cloudy. That since our heat wave of last summer.

If we're negotiating, I am seeking credit for my client for two flat rear tires served already, and as for the exploding clutch, I'm offering a plea bargain down to one worn out rear wheel spline replaced on the Eldo as well. The Bassa ? I'm hoping that my biggest challenge will be the plastichrome falling off. I have some plans for rattlecan, pinstripe tape and acorn hardware.