Geico Makes a Housecall

[rodekyll]

Tex was wrangling his free range turnips out on the south acreage When he encountered a semi-overgrown turnip nest, and dropped his favorite farm Eldo "Mayonnaise" into the 4-foot hole.  There was damage.




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Tex always said he intended to get insurance for ol' Mayo, so we figured it was only fair to call Geico and see if they intended to cover the damage.  They were real reasonable when we 'splained them about how we'd had only the very best intentions and set up an appointment to survey the damage.  At the expected time, a cute little car with logos all over fell into another turnip nest, and the agent, about what you'd expect from Geico, went to work.

First he checked the VIN




how to upload photos to the internet


Then matched up the plate...





...and got an odometer reading -- standard stuff for the industry, I guess.





He was a little snarky going over the damage, but was thorough.  He noticed the bent lever,





and a bug.  Who can blame him, really.





Hmmm.  Possible engine damage, wot?





"Yeah," he snarked, "That'll buff out."




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Is this supposed to look like that?




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  . . . and is this a custom fork?




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The inspection dragged on.  I won't bore you with the details.  While the agent worked,  Tex hitched his matched team of draft Ambos, Grease and Lard (not kidding about the names) to his little green car and pulled it from the turnip nest before they got back from the tavern.  drunk turnips hate insurance adjusters, and we didn't need THAT drama.

Afterward we chatted about the oleo ranch v the rigors of celebrity life, parting company assured that everone had their preferred vocation.  Then the roadrunner zipped by, parting our hero from himself.





So I don't think the claim will be approved.  Anyone want to buy a car?  It's green . . . .

[balvenie]

Very well written, rodekyll
Very well illustrated

[azguzzirep]

Hey Wayne, lighten up dude😀.

It's more  about  a Gecko., really!

Cute little feller.✌✌
Tom

[Lannis]

I bought Geico insurance because I'd rather have a lizard over to the house to check on my damage than that spooky-looking woman from Progressive ....

[guzzimatic]

I want some of what you have been smokin' !!!

[Matteo]

I want some of what you have been smokin' !!!

Careful what you ask for, it will paralyze you. Just sayin 

[twowings]

Didn't know you were gonna whip out a lizard! 

I wouldn't even bother re-painting that bike...just haul it to the top of a hill and ride it!!

[rodekyll]

Careful what you ask for, it will paralyze you. Just sayin 

Matt, you say that like it's a bad thing.   

[Matteo]

Not if your ready for bed

[Texas Turnip]

The lizards will turn all colors except chrome. There ain't much chrome here at the Oleo Ranch.

Tex

[oldbike54]

The lizards will turn all colors except chrome. There ain't much chrome here at the Oleo Ranch.

Tex

 Yeah , and what little there is hasn't been washed for so long it's kinda hard to see 

  Dusty

[ITSec]

Hey Wayne, lighten up dude😀.

It's more  about  a Gecko., really!

Cute little feller.✌✌
Tom

That's no gecko - that's an anole (false chameleon). Had one as a pet when I was about 8 or 9...

[oldbike54]

That's no gecko - that's an anole (false chameleon). Had one as a pet when I was about 8 or 9...

 Dang , all this time I thought it was Michael Caine in a funny lizard suit 

 Dusty

[RANDM]

Then a Roadrunner came by and parted our hero from himself.

Hope that doesn't mean the little fella got gobbled?

Maurie.

[rodekyll]

Yeah, I planted the inference that it was a gecko, but my kid already told me it was an anole.  I see from the comments that some folks might have actually thought it was a Geico employee.  Nope.  Just an actor, getting paid scale.  Thankfully, the roadrunner happened by before I handed him the check.

You gotta suspend your disbelief a little to enjoy the tale.  The real story was that I was photographing parts for ebay and noticed the little guy scouting for bugs.  How often does THAT happen to you?  I got about 40 pics before the roadrunner got him.  Looking them over I noticed two things:  First, this false chameleon can't sense color on chrome, so it stays green.  Second, if I cherry-picked and rearranged the sequence of pics, there was a funny story waiting to be told.

Then a Roadrunner came by and parted our hero from himself.

Hope that doesn't mean the little fella got gobbled?

Maurie.

Maurie, I'm sad to report that a lizard was harmed during the production of that true-nature adventure.  If you zoom in on the roadrunner, you might be able to make out some feet and a round red spot that used to be the rest of him.  That roadrunner has also gotten a couple of bluebird chicks, a huge toad, and another lizard that I've seen him with. 

[RANDM]

Bugger - I thought they only ate Coyotes, oh well, we're all food
for something.

Maurie.

[sib]

Just an actor, getting paid scale.

What is scale for a reptile?

[rodekyll]

What is scale for a reptile?

'bout the same as for a fish.

[Lannis]

That won't work for sharks or catfish, they don't have scales.

Just the occasional fin will make them happy.

[pazzmore]

Why isn't there a "like" button on this forum?

[Lannis]

Why isn't there a "like" button on this forum?

Because there is no light without darkness, and no life without death.    What is unending life but an eternal death?

Similarly, along with a "Like" function comes the dreaded "Unlike" or "Ignore", and before long people are stabbing the IGNORE button with an "AHAH!   I've now showed HIM!   He has 10 IGNORES, that will teach HIM a lesson" and the whole thing turns into Mrs. Ellis's third grade classroom .... 

Lannis

[LowRyter]

geeessss.... I thought this was Testarossa's insurance thread!

[Lannis]

geeessss.... I thought this was Testarossa's insurance thread!

Well ... THAT'll be a mistake you won't make again, then .... ?

[rodekyll]

Yeah, you gotta be wary of my topics.  If they're not technical they're probably just silly.  Fun, I hope, but silly.  Storytelling is a valuable skill in the Alaska winters.   

[Chuck in Indiana]

You're good at it, too..