Friday Funny

[sdcr]

Full disclosure, lifted from another forum

An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"
The old timer said, "I'm a biker and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight on Sundays and out sliding around corners, "shootin" sand washes and riding up and down the steepest, wildest mountains I can find at the crack of dawn."
The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died?" The old biker said, "Who said my dad's dead?"
The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?"
The old biker said, "He's 99 years old and, in fact, he went riding with me this Sunday, and that's why he's still alive... he's a biker too."
The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?"
The old biker said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"
The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! How old is he?"
The old biker replied, "He's 117 years old."
The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went riding with you this Sunday too?"
The old timer said, "No... Grandpa couldn't go this week because he got married."
The Doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Good Lord!!! Why would a 117-year-old guy want to get married?"
To this old biker smiled and answered,
"Who said he wanted to?"

[Huzo]

That’s fantastic..
Well told..

[berniebee]

  Good one!

[Guzzistajohn]

  Good stuff! I miss the days when you could tell a joke. You just don't hear them any more!

[Testarossa]

 That was my mother's favorite joke. But she told it about an old man splitting firewood.

[wirespokes]

hahaha ha ha

Good one

How about the bumper sticker:

If you lived in your car
You'd already be home

[Guzzistajohn]

A lady takes her dog to the vet because she thought is was going deaf. The Doc takes a look and tells her she just needs to trim the hair out of his ears. Get some NAIR and the hair will fall right out.

Lady goes to Walgreens and the dude at the register tells her if she's getting this Nair for her under arms she should wear a cotton shirt for a day or two. She says "It's not for my underarms".

Dude says, "If you use it on your legs you might not want to wear panty hose for awhile."

Lady- "It's not for my legs, it's for my little schnauzer"

Well, then I wouldn't ride a bicycle for at LEAST a week!

[Murray]

Slight politcal bent:

Harvard/Oxford/Monash univeristy are running a study into the power of the press on the policial class:

The Prime Minster/President refused to comment as he has to read the paper tomorrow to see what he thinks.