Airline hell, and old age is not for sissies

[Testarossa]

Got a call Sunday morning that my dad and his wife are both in the hospital, in San Rafael, Calif. Marie, who sufferes from Parkinsons and osteoporosis, fell Saturday night and shattered her left forearm and wrist -- compound fracture into a zillion little bits.  Horrible. My 93-year-old dad had an anxiety attack. Her daughter is away in Europe until July 15.

So I booked a 2:15 flight out of DEN, and left the house at 12:30, planning to catch a 3pm bus from SFO to Marin. At the airport I got a text that the flight was delayed until 3:30. Gate agent told me the aircraft was still on the ground at Colo Spgs with a mechanical problem.

So I went to customer service and asked if I could get on the 3:15 flight to SFO. The agent said don't bother, the problem is weather in San Francisco and all flights there are delayed. This turns out to have been a lie. That flight eventually took off at 3:20.

Meanwhile there were further delays in Colo Spgs and the plane finally arrived DEN at 4:30, with departure rescheduled for 5:15. Delayed again to 5:45.  Delayed again to 6:30.

Then the gate agent announced that this plane now has a flat tire and we'll be boarded on a new aircraft. Gate change. About 120 people trooped up the hall to the new gate. Time now 7:15. It was explained to us that at 8:00pm the crew would be timed out and the flight cancelled, so please board expeditiously. At 7:40 we were all seated and the doors closed. Then we waited ten minutes for the fuel crew to finish topping off. Then we pushed and pretty much sprinted for the runway as the first raindrops fell. At 7:58, as we were about to turn onto the active, the captain announced that due to lightning, the airport had closed and would reopen after the cell passed over. Of course, that would be after the crew-rest regulation kicked in, so the flight was cancelled and we returned to the gate. Because the airport was closed, no jetway driver was available. At 8:30 we were finally off the plane.

The airline rebooked us on a new flight for 5:40 am, and I arrived in Marin at 8:00am Monday morning.

Dad is out of the hospital. Marie will be there for a couple of weeks. Time for assisted living.

[Chuck in Indiana]

<sigh> Hang in there..

[davedel44]

Hope every will be alright including you!  I can sympathize.  Two horrible flights last week Houston to Toronto and back.  Weather delays cancellations, overbookings, bumped and an extra hour delay at Agricultural check point because I mistakenly left an apple in my backpack.  Can't imagining facing those hassles while trying to get to a sick parent.  Flying sucks these days.
Dave
Galveston

[Guzzistajohn]

Yep Seth, they have taken the fun right out of flying. I always dred it. Sorry for your parent troubles, we just had a suprise party for mom's 90th. I convinced her to use a walker a few years ago, I hope she doesn't take a spill. You're a good son

[cruzziguzzi]

So I went to customer service and asked if I could get on the 3:15 flight to SFO. The agent said don't bother, the problem is weather in San Francisco and all flights there are delayed. This turns out to have been a lie. That flight eventually took off at 3:20.

I wonder why they would lie about that, weird?

Then the gate agent announced that this plane now has a flat tire and we'll be boarded on a new aircraft. Gate change. About 120 people trooped up the hall to the new gate. Time now 7:15. It was explained to us that at 8:00pm the crew would be timed out and the flight cancelled, so please board expeditiously. At 7:40 we were all seated and the doors closed. Then we waited ten minutes for the fuel crew to finish topping off. Then we pushed and pretty much sprinted for the runway as the first raindrops fell. At 7:58, as we were about to turn onto the active, the captain announced that due to lightning, the airport had closed and would reopen after the cell passed over. Of course, that would be after the crew-rest regulation kicked in, so the flight was cancelled and we returned to the gate. Because the airport was closed, no jetway driver was available. At 8:30 we were finally off the plane.

Sounds like one of the "principals" had a date or party to attend in Denver. Smacks of the old Air Force "stalls" used to get to see the Pyramids or score an overnite in Bermuda. As long as I benefitted as well, I didn't care.

Sucks having both of yours go south at the same time but likely your Dad will be less resistant to assistance than many are without the shock of a scenario like this.

Todd.

[Lannis]

I wonder why they would lie about that, weird?

I was booked on a flight home to Virginia from Charlotte one night on a commuter flight from the "E" concourse.   The flight was scheduled for 8:30 PM.    I was there about 8:00 and the pilots and crew came through around 8:10 and told us to go ahead and board.   There were only 5 of us for a 19-passenger plane so I thought "Hallelujah!   A flight that's not full and getting me home early!".    We taxied out 5 minutes later.

Wheels up about 8:20 and THEN the pilot came on and said we had "Mechanical Problems" and would return to the airport to get them fixed.   We turned around, landed, taxied back, sat for a minute, and 14 more people got on the plane, and we took right off.

Mechanical problems, right.   They left too early, left some people behind, came back, got them, and then lied about it like big dogs.   I hate when that happens.

Lannis

[Testarossa]

I wonder why they would lie about that, weird?

It wasn't "they," it was one bored agent who didn't want to bother with me.

[Gliderjohn]

Been there and have th e-shirt. Do what you can do. There comes that time you have to be the parent of your parents.
GliderJohn

[HardAspie]

I'm sorry. Some phases of life are heart rending.

[Guido Valvole]

Untied, right? I'd been calling them that for a while when I discovered there was a "fan" (lol) website called untied.com...
I've been through that with both parents. Condolences maximus. I'm in the general (Bay) area, PM if you need anything although I can't guarantee immediate response and will be out all day Wednesday. You've been through enough negative s**t lately…
cr

[NCAmother]

Got a call Sunday morning that my dad and his wife are both in the hospital, in San Rafael, Calif. Marie, who sufferes from Parkinsons and osteoporosis, fell Saturday night and shattered her left forearm and wrist -- compound fracture into a zillion little bits.  Horrible. My 93-year-old dad had an anxiety attack. Her daughter is away in Europe until July 15.

So I booked a 2:15 flight out of DEN, and left the house at 12:30, planning to catch a 3pm bus from SFO to Marin. At the airport I got a text that the flight was delayed until 3:30. Gate agent told me the aircraft was still on the ground at Colo Spgs with a mechanical problem.

So I went to customer service and asked if I could get on the 3:15 flight to SFO. The agent said don't bother, the problem is weather in San Francisco and all flights there are delayed. This turns out to have been a lie. That flight eventually took off at 3:20.

Meanwhile there were further delays in Colo Spgs and the plane finally arrived DEN at 4:30, with departure rescheduled for 5:15. Delayed again to 5:45.  Delayed again to 6:30.

Then the gate agent announced that this plane now has a flat tire and we'll be boarded on a new aircraft. Gate change. About 120 people trooped up the hall to the new gate. Time now 7:15. It was explained to us that at 8:00pm the crew would be timed out and the flight cancelled, so please board expeditiously. At 7:40 we were all seated and the doors closed. Then we waited ten minutes for the fuel crew to finish topping off. Then we pushed and pretty much sprinted for the runway as the first raindrops fell. At 7:58, as we were about to turn onto the active, the captain announced that due to lightning, the airport had closed and would reopen after the cell passed over. Of course, that would be after the crew-rest regulation kicked in, so the flight was cancelled and we returned to the gate. Because the airport was closed, no jetway driver was available. At 8:30 we were finally off the plane.

The airline rebooked us on a new flight for 5:40 am, and I arrived in Marin at 8:00am Monday morning.

Dad is out of the hospital. Marie will be there for a couple of weeks. Time for assisted living.

Sorry to hear about your parents.  Airlines, don't even get me started

[lorazepam]

Sorry to hear about your parents, It makes it even more difficult when they are far away.
I am to the point that if it is an 8 hour drive or less, screw flying, I will drive or ride.

[HardAspie]

After ten years of mom care...no respite; I finally had to place her into a care facility. A very bad day even though I knew it was necessary.

[tris]

Been there and have th e-shirt. Do what you can do. There comes that time you have to be the parent of your parents.
GliderJohn

Mhhh - I think that's getting close for me

A month or so back 84 YO Mum fell over and broke her arm
A week or so back she fell over and lay in the bath room until the old man (82) found her
Then I hear that my Dad fell up the patio steps and gashed himself all over the place and was patched up by my Mum

Problem is that they live 4 hours away from me (which is LONG way over here ) so I can't sensibly "drop in on them" and they get stressed when I say I'm coming down and often don't want me to come as "it makes things difficult for them as they have to LOOK after me"

Looks like there's a tricky conversation coming up that I'm likely to lose if the past is anything to go by - hey ho 

[Lannis]

Mhhh - I think that's getting close for me

A month or so back 84 YO Mum fell over and broke her arm
A week or so back she fell over and lay in the bath room until the old man (82) found her
Then I hear that my Dad fell up the patio steps and gashed himself all over the place and was patched up by my Mum

Problem is that they live 4 hours away from me (which is LONG way over here ) so I can't sensibly "drop in on them" and they get stressed when I say I'm coming down and often don't want me to come as "it makes things difficult for them as they have to LOOK after me"

Looks like there's a tricky conversation coming up that I'm likely to lose if the past is anything to go by - hey ho 

Many, many of us have had to go through that conversation.   Sometimes more than once.

Without any reflection on anyone's parents or loved ones, I hope that WE, the generation that has had to deal with this issue, will learn this -

PLEASE don't become an unnecessary burden on your own loved ones.   You can help by NOT insisting that you "live on your own" LONG after you are not able to live on your own.    DON'T think that you are being "strong" and "independent" by trying to live in a house you can't maintain, forgetting to take medications that you need, hurting yourself constantly, and forcing other people to constantly come and solve an emergency, put out a fire on the stove, pick you up off the floor, try to revive you from diabetic shock ....

My mother did that - we offered to have her come live with any of her children, who would have been glad to care for her in their homes.   We offered to have someone come and care for her in her own house.   We offered to help her move to an assisted living apartment.   She rejected ALL of that, insisted that she was fine, and the issue was forced only after the second time she was carried out of the house on a gurney, after which WE chose an assisted living apartment for her.

ALL of my grandparents' generation planned for their own care - moving in with children, moving into the Virginia Baptist Home, having a caregiver move into a room in their own house and cook and clean for them, moving into "progressive" care (a house, then an apartment, later assisted living, then nursing care, all in the same complex).

NONE of my parent's generation did or have done that.   All of them lived or are living in untenable situations, insisting they can care for themselves but in fact their children are trying to do it remotely, because they WON'T have anyone there for them.

Plan ahead!

Lannis

[not-fishing]

There is another choice, to go the way of the Native Americans.

I have already told my wife and kids I plan on taking a walk in the mountains.  I've hunted, hiked, snow camped, alpine skied, skate skied in the snow covered mountains.  I feel comfortable there so when I finally have had enough I will take a walk in the snow (or mountains).

I refuse to die after spending months in a hospital, butchered like my father.

Mark

[Bill Hagan]

There is another choice, to go the way of the Native Americans.

I have already told my wife and kids I plan on taking a walk in the mountains.  I've hunted, hiked, snow camped, alpine skied, skate skied in the snow covered mountains.  I feel comfortable there so when I finally have had enough I will take a walk in the snow (or mountains).

I refuse to die after spending months in a hospital, butchered like my father.

Mark

Reminds me of Capt. Oates's line: "I am just going outside and may be some time."  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lawrence_Oates

We all wish we could do that when the right time comes, but the hard reality is that we might not know that time.

Many -- and likely most -- of us confront such challenges "as we speak."  Kathi and I make a 1200-mile-plus r/t every month to give my brother a break in caring for Mom.  Yes, she's in a nursing home, but had to be taken there (now two years ago!) by ambulance for "rehab" after a open fracture to her tibia.  That, after many other EMS incidents.  But she was and is iron-willed, and for a few years now has suffered from dementia.

We are considering bringing her to a Virginia nursing home, if nothing else to give my brother, who dotes on her every day, some of his life back.  Tough times for the parents and children of any age.

And, those children -- we and those reading this -- are next in line.  As says Lannis, hope we choose well and can do what we choo$e.

Best wishes to you, Testarossa, and, actually, to us all and ours.

Bill

[Edited to take out all those funny diamonds I seem to get when I post.  ]

[Mark West]

Very sorry to hear about your family's situation. Always difficult to be so far away when your parents are elderly.

As someone who flies 6-8 times a year for business, I have my share of horror stories. A recent one made me so mad, I swore to American Airlines that neither I or anyone that works for me will ever book with them again.

I regret saying that I now fly Southwest whenever possible. What used to be considered as a no-frills airline, now is the best airline experience among domestic carriers IMHO. They have maintained the same standard for years, while the rest have taken every opportunity to find new ways to inconvenience you and make you pay for it.

[pyoungbl]

All this reminds me of Dave Çarroll's song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YGc4zOqozo

all about United breaking his guitar.  In the end he shamed them so much they paid.

[Lannis]

There is another choice, to go the way of the Native Americans.

I have already told my wife and kids I plan on taking a walk in the mountains.  I've hunted, hiked, snow camped, alpine skied, skate skied in the snow covered mountains.  I feel comfortable there so when I finally have had enough I will take a walk in the snow (or mountains).

I refuse to die after spending months in a hospital, butchered like my father.

Mark

That's a good way to go if you still have your mind intact and your body about to fail ... but too often it goes the other way, and you have no chance to make that choice .... A failed body with a functioning mind is easier to deal with than the converse.

Lannis

[Testarossa]

One of the smartest men I ever knew was a veteran mountaineer -- there's a peak in Antarctica named for him. He had memorized all of Paradise Lost and when we hiked together he recited it.

He was in his 50s when diagnosed with cancer. He spent a week saying goodbye to friends and family, then walked into the mountains with a bottle of whiskey and died that night of hypothermia.

[Lannis]

Very sorry to hear about your family's situation. Always difficult to be so far away when your parents are elderly.

As someone who flies 6-8 times a year for business, I have my share of horror stories. A recent one made me so mad, I swore to American Airlines that neither I or anyone that works for me will ever book with them again.

I regret saying that I now fly Southwest whenever possible. What used to be considered as a no-frills airline, now is the best airline experience among domestic carriers IMHO. They have maintained the same standard for years, while the rest have taken every opportunity to find new ways to inconvenience you and make you pay for it.

I flew every month or so for business up until last year.

I must say that GENERALLY, I had pretty good service from the airlines overall.   I don't like how tight they space their seats, but that's usually when there's three guys my size lined up in aisle, center, and window.   I'm sure that the little Oriental gal curled up in the seat, sleeping, with room for a whole 'nother one of her in there doesn't have that concern.

Most of my flights were on time, and I'm fine with it if the captain diverts so as not to fly straight into a thunderstorm.

I only had my checked luggage lost once, and a porter delivered it to my room about 6 hours later. 

When it goes bad, it can really go bad, but I think we tend to remember all the bad experiences forever, and the good ones not so much .... ?

Lannis 

[clubman]

At one time I flew over half of the earth and back numerous times and enjoyed most of it, I haven't been off of the ground (except for the occassional low altitude wheelie) in 12 yrs. and I don't miss it. Screw em'. Greed can ruin just about anything and it certainly has killed the "flying" experience. I will fly again only due to dire necessity.

[Penderic]

When the airlines were so happy to see you ......

[Arizona Wayne]

Guess I've been lucky in that both my parents died @ home in their `70s when they were still mostly functional.   Because of that figure my days on this earth are coming to an end.   Many of my high school peers(guys) are dropping like flies.   


Haven't flown in an airplane in decades and have no reason to.  Mainly travel by MC, scooter. 

[HardAspie]

One sign of my ageing is that the people I know no longer die of exciting things: being lost at sea on a small boat, bicycling accidents, mountaineering; they are dying of cancer and heart attacks. My mother dies of a complex combination of things, but it was the Alzheimer's that was the worst; she was dead long before she died. I kinda want my last words to be: "Whoa, shit!"

[Testarossa]

Hold my beer and watch this.

[HardAspie]

To the Red Head...

1959 Piper Comanche 250. I am indeed impressed. Fast, beautiful, efficient.

[Testarossa]

Fast, beautiful, efficient.

Broke my heart to sell it.

[HardAspie]

Beautiful. Thanks for posting a photo. I'll bet selling it broke your heart. Cherish every minute at the controls.